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Hot headed or ice cool... What is your approach?

Posted on 28/08/2015 by


The caption above, is one of the most common posts I see on Linkedin, behind your standard maths question (Yes we all know the answer) and name a country with the letter “A” in. Users are posting them or liking them for one clear goal, they are looking for more exposure to their network and the outside world (or they really want to prove they are a genius), but why do so many people like and post the former?

Are they really that unhappy with their manager; that they want to tell the 300 million members on Linkedin, which likely includes their current manager and colleagues, that they are terrible managers… Or could they be having a very unsubtle dig at their previous manager?  

I must confess that I have liked one of these posts shortly after joining my current company, but it was in no way a parting dig at my previous manager/s, as they were great (I was supporting a previous friend who I helped find his new job)… Although liking it could explain why I have not heard from my former manager/friend again… Whoops!

If you are unhappy with your manager, but love the job… Would you really consider leaving without addressing it with your manager or the higher powers? Unfortunately I have seen numerous people leave because they were too scared to address this situation, when in fact it can easily be resolved, if you address it openly and honestly, most companies welcome this feedback.

So how do you address this if you feel like your boss is as approachable as Tony Soprano? (Apart from behind a bullet proof glass)

  1. Do not act immediately – This is so crucial, far too many times employees will react in the heat of the moment and then wake up the next morning regretting their actions. So take some time, various work coaches will advise you to count to 100, but in my experience I would say wait 24 hours, talk to a family member or friends and if in the morning you are still ready to fight, then move on to the next step.
  2. Write down your problems – Highlighting what the issues were, how you have tried to resolve them, how they made you feel, etc. Try to have as many facts as possible
  3. Arrange a meeting - If you are to resolve the matter, it is best to do it in person in a meeting room, not on the phone and certainly not in front of your colleagues
  4. Leave your emotions at the door – There is nothing worse than going into a meeting with your blood still boiling, as no matter what your manager says, you will always walk out with the same outcome.
  5. Have an outcome in mind – Do you want this to end with you handing your notice in? Do you want the promotion that you was passed up on? Do you not want to take the blame? What do you want to come out of this meeting? Your issue will never be resolved, if you do not have an end goal.

My points above are short and simple, will it work for you? That all depends on yourself and your situation, but in my experience in recruitment, I can count on one hand the number of times a candidate has told me a meeting with his manager failed and made it worse. Why? Because, no manager is truly unapproachable, every manager wants a healthy team and will more often than not do what is needed to keep a productive team.

Especially when a manager is aware of the true cost of losing you and hiring a new employee which Forbes highlighted:

Have you had a disagreement with your manager and left? Have you tried to resolve it with your manager and are still happy? Would love to hear from employees or managers who have encountered similar situations before.

As a closing note… This is my first blog, if you liked it and found it helpful, then it was my amazing idea to start blogging, but if you feel you have just wasted 2 minutes reading this, then it was definitely my manager’s idea...